Tag Archives: funny

Today’s Book Blurb

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Dread pirates and smugglers called Ragamuffins. I’m trying to take this seriously, but every time I look at the cover I start chortling.

Happy Friday!

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Descended from the islanders of lost Earth, the Ragamuffins are pirates and smugglers, plying the lonely spaceways around a dead wormhole. For years, the Satraps have tolerated the Raga, but no longer. Now they have embarked on a campaign of extermination, determined to wipe out the unruly humans once and for all.

But one runaway woman may complicate their plans. Combat enabled, Nashara is more machine than flesh, and she carries inside her a doomsday weapon that could reduce the entire galaxy to chaos. A hunted fugitive, she just wants to get home before she’s forced to destroy civilization – and herself.

– Ragamuffin (Xenowealth #2) by Tobias S. Buckell

Today’s Book Blurb

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It’s the demon in the toilet bowl that always gets you…
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It’s never a good day when an ancient demon shows up on your toilet bowl. For Lizzie Brown, that’s just the beginning. Soon her hyperactive terrier starts talking, and her long-lost biker witch Grandma is hurling Smuckers jars filled with magic. Just when she thinks she’s seen it all, Lizzie learns she’s a demon slayer — and all hell is after her.

Of course, that’s not the only thing after her. Dimitri Kallinikos, a devastatingly handsome shape-shifting griffin needs Lizzie to slay a demon of his own. But how do you talk a girl you’ve never met into going straight to the underworld? Lie. And if that doesn’t work, how dangerous could a little seduction be…?

– The Accidental Demon Slayer (Demon Slayer #1) by Angie Fox

Today’s Book Blurb: A unicorn and dinosaur walk into a plot

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This one was submitted as a review request. We don’t do children’s books, but I couldn’t resist passing along the book description.

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“Azaria, a unicorn colt, is intrigued when the young, clairvoyant dinosaur, Darius, foresees a terrifying change to their world.”

– The Legacy (The Shadow of the Unicorn #1) by Suzanne de Montigny

Today’s Book Blurb: Life is hard

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Oh the puns. The puns. They’re daring me to pick this book up off the shelf.

Must. Resist.

 

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“Suddenly desperate, the inexperienced ex-rich girl was forced to take the only job she could get: as a tour guide in a cemetery. But a grave situation took a turn for the worse when a head-on collision with a headstone left her with an unwanted ability to communicate with the disgruntled deceased . . . and now Pepper has a whacked Mafia don demanding that she hunt down his killers — and threatening to haunt her until she does.”

– Don of the Dead (Pepper Martin #1) by Casey Daniels

Today’s Book Blurb: Kinda want to read this

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This is one of the those where no book will ever compare to what you make up in your head.
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“In a world nearly identical to ours, the North won the Civil War, Ben Affleck is the sexiest man alive, and Russia never sold Alaska to the U.S. Instead, Alaska is a rough, beautiful country ruled by a famously eccentric royal family, and urgently in need of a bride for the Crown Prince. But they have no idea what they’re in for when they offer the job to a feisty commoner.”

– The Royal Treatment (Alaskan Royal Family #1) by MaryJanice Davidson

Today’s Book Blurb: The name should have tipped you off.

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“Broken Heart is the city with the highest rate of divorce and highest percentage of single parents in Oklahoma. And I, Jessica Matthews, have been a member of that club ever since my husband dumped me for his twentysomething secretary and then had the gall to die in a car accident. Now I’m not just a single mother trying to make ends meet in this crazy world.”
– I’m the Vampire, That’s Why (Broken Heart #1) by Michele Bardsley

Today’s Book Blurb: Wait, really?

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I can’t decide if this is going to be incredibly clever or incredibly campy. Whatever it is, I’m not sure I have the strength to resist.
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With her globetrotting career of protecting the British Prime Minister, Bronwyn isn’t your ordinary witch. But her powers can’t help her decide between a sexy Sheik and the town doctor, who happens to be a warlock – and more than worthy of a liplock.
– Charmed & Dangerous (Bronwyn the Witch #1) by Candace Havens

Today’s Book Blurb: Wait, really?

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When Denver-based Were blogger and founder of Honoring of Werewolf Legacy (HOWL) Kate Stillman agrees to take on political “bad boy” Duncan MacDowell in a public debate about werewolf segregation, she’s confident she’ll sail through the challenge without letting down her guard.And what can go wrong while hanging out with the sexy Scottish founder of Werewolves Optimizing Our Future (WOOF) long enough to convince him his views on interspecies mating are mistaken?

– Werewolf in Denver (Wild About You #4) by Vicki Lewis Thompson

Those acronyms. Oh those acronyms.

Aside: Any bets on how she’ll win him to her cause? Philosophical discourse? Courteous debate? A five-point plan? A game of chess?

Today’s Book Blurb: #VampireProbs

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“Eric’s got issues. He has short-term and long-term memory problems; he can’t remember who he ate for dinner yesterday, much less how he became a vampire in the first place. All Eric wants to do is run his strip club, drink a little blood, and be left alone. Instead, he must survive car crashes, enchanted bullets, sunlight, sex magic, and werewolves on ice–not to mention his own nasty temper and forgetfulness.”

– Staked by J.F. Lewis