It’s the question on everyone’s mind: Who should win Game of Thrones? Here are my top 5 contenders, based on no research, zero books read, and no episodes watched.
Let the battle for who would look best on the Iron Throne begin! Team least decapitated wins and gets to climb a wall to kill a winter king.
5. This Fire Cow
Fire Cow took the lead early in the polls, but failed to keep up its high score in the ice challenge. Fire Cow’s extra layers of wood, timber and open flames would have looked great on the Throne. Alas.
4. These Sketchy Owls
They advertise themselves as this year’s premiere feathery power couple. They say all their plots are collaborative affairs, but we all know who’s the brains of this outfit. Unfortunately, they failed to poll well with the crow demographic and ended up in fourth place.
3. This Explorer
You might have to look closely to see it, but that mustache is everything.
Work demands a lot from us. Sometimes too much. Here are the seven places where you need to draw the line in the sand. And then set the line on fire. And buy a couple crocodiles to guard it for you.
1. Your value. You may work in the non-profit world, or maybe your company is stingy as hell. Don’t undersell yourself. Be your own advocate. Demand fair compensation for the value you’re bringing to your company. The bigger your paycheck, the more you can spend on books. Hardcovers don’t grow on your bookshelves, you know.
2. You commuting time. This is you-time. Sure, you could prepare for that morning meeting. But that’s what those five minutes waiting for Mike to join are for. Use the 40 minutes on the bus or metro to squeeze in another couple chapters, or pop in an audiobook in your car.
1. Edward Cullen from the Twilight Series
In the first draft of Stephanie Meyer’s famous book, romantic interest Edward Cullen was originally conceived as a semi-feral cat that Bella finds under her car in the school parking lot and tries to tame and take home. In subsequent revisions, Edward was transformed into a vampire, but many of the original, feline-oriented scenes were left in the final publication.
2. Bilbo Baggins from The Hobbit
Tolkien is well known for his extensive world-building notes. A recently discovered journal reveals that the great author originally planned to have the Shire populated by cats. It was only after he finished developing his other Middle Earth races that he changed the name of his Shire-dwellers from “feline” to the more original-sounding “hobbits.” Over the next few years, other changes followed so that today, the only remnant of Bilbo Baggins The Orange Tabby is the character’s catlike stealth and dislike of change.
Credit: SuperFan Builds
5. Mordor from Lord of the Rings by JRR Tolkien
Since the bestselling travelogue and memoir Lord of the Rings came out, Mordor’s reputation has quickly skyrocketed from obscure natural orc reserve known only to the truly dedicated, to a must-go travel destination found on nearly every bucket list.
Well known for its stable weather patterns, battle reenactments, nightly light shows, and bubbling volcano-heated hot springs, Mordor provides a dramatic backdrop to a couple looking for a picturesque setting for their wedding. Barad-dûr, known as the Dark Tower to the locals, boasts the area’s highest vantage point and is a natural go-to spot for a photo-op. For an even better view, charter an eagle flight for the afternoon.
Couples looking for the adventure of travel with the trappings of civilization will enjoy the comfort of big-name hotels and wealth of direct flights to Mordor. Applying for a marriage license is easy; present proof of citizenship, your length of stay, and marital status. A local goblin clerk can process your request overnight.
4. Shayol Ghul from The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan
Credit: The Last Battle / Aradani Studios
For those looking for the scenic drama of Mordor without the lines, Shayol Ghul is an excellent choice. Located at the core of the Blasted Lands and inaccessible by land due to the vast expanse of the Great Blight, Shayol Ghul has remained accessible only through a small airline, specialized to take on the local weather. That said, the layer of fog and constant lightning across the Blasted Lands is perfect for couples looking to enjoy a night club atmosphere. Continue reading