A couple weeks back, Madison Woods stopped by and asked us if we’d be interested in taking over her hands-down-one-of-the-best-ways-to-get-real-reader-feedback series, “Vote for it”. Of course we said “Yes!”
Every week, Madison gave her blog over to a 25-word elevator pitch sent in by an author. Readers of her blog had the opportunity to vote for whether the 25-word blurb made them curious or not about the book. Would they buy such a book? Though the voting is anonymous, many readers opted to leave a comment too, helping the author get a sense of what was working and what wasn’t. And we are honored and excited to continue the tradition.
“Authors, what we’re measuring is reader interpretation. What does someone think of your book when they read your short blurb? Does it make them want to buy it or at least read further? Editors and publishers may look at these blurbs differently, but ultimately, they’re readers too.” (Madison Woods)
So what happens now? Read the pitch/blurb below and then vote if you think you’d be interested enough buy the book. If you have constructive crit to offer, share it in comments below!
Reminder: Please only vote if you can be objective about the quality of the blurb. Don’t vote ‘No’ because you don’t read or if you’re flat-out not a fan of the genre or type of book.
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Title: Earth Sink Author: Ilyan Kei Lavanway
Genre: Science Fiction
___“Earth Sink. Face unfathomable horror and anguish. The luxury of death eludes you. The world calls it fable, until history’s most denied climax becomes undeniable.”
Share your thoughts, canaries! Would you buy it?
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If you too want to put your 25-word elevator pitch to the test, send us your blurb (of 25 words of less) to canarypost@gmail.com with the subject line: “25 word pitch.” But be warned, 25 word summaries are tricky little blighters! And surprisingly hard to write.
And keep an eye out for more pitch slaughters, to be posted on Thursdays!
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Some more links of interest:
- Madison Wood’s “Would you buy it?” series
- Canary Pitch Slaps – for step by step breakdown of pitches
- Fantasy author’s David B. Coe thoughts on writing the elevator pitch
The Book Canaries 
It feels soooooooo strange to come here but it’s good!! Thank you for accepting the offer to do this 🙂
As for Ilyan’s pitch, it feels a little vague to me, and I’d be more inclined to crack the book open if I had more to go on. Is it a vampire story? That’s kind of how it sounds, and that’s a really hard sell for me. I’d like to know what ‘Earth Sink’ means, too.
I agree with Madison. The words “Earth Sink” were the biggest hook of the blurb–and they didn’t even have to be in the blurb, since they’re the title. The title makes me wonder about the many meanings of the words “earth” and “sink”. Sinking earth. Earth as a sink for something…etc.
For the rest of the blurb, too vague for me. My imagination wants to grab hold of something. Words like “unfathomable horror and anguish” mean little to me without context, though I’m curious about why death would be a luxury. Is it death that is called a fable or the earth sink? My imagination is more confused than intrigued, but I definitely see promise–I just need more premise!
I was assuming “Earth as a sink for something” …
My main concern is that I’m being told that *I* think death is a luxury (that whole “you” thing …). And so I go on to assume that “history’s most denied climax” is also death … and it becomes undeniable … which is a good thing, right? Since I think it’s a luxury.
Blurbs and pitches a so incredibly hard to write well, so I’m not wanting to bash your volunteer, here, but it needs some work.
Too vague. This could be any genre, for one thing, and doesn’t point to sci-fi in particular without the “Sci-Fi” tag at the top. I tend to associate far more with characters than with random, vaguely hinted at events. Give me a character please. I’d like to know the name of who I’m following around for a book. Agreed with CanaryTheFirst. Words and phrases like “unfathomable horror” don’t make me need to buy a book. Interesting characters, interesting premise, or even the outright label of what kind of book it is (Is it a Space Opera? Or is it an alternate history with time travel?). I tend to buy based on tropes and trends I know I like, so if a book doesn’t give me a taste of some tropes and trends, I can’t decide if I even want to look at it and it usually goes back on the shelf. With more information, maybe. I’m not a big sci-fi reader, so it would really depend on what the story is about (which the blurb should help me decide).
It’s too vague, and all the sentences are “blurb speak” in which they’re attention-grabbing openers that grab attention when used correctly, but unfortunately not here. In a 25-word pitch, get rid of the blurb speak.
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